Monday, December 6, 2010

Gingerbread House Hunters

Newlyweds Fred and Ginger have been living in the Gingerbread Village neighborhood of Gingerbread City for almost a year. While they enjoy the big city life, they're TIRED of paying big city rent.


Today they're meeting with their real estate agent, Polly, to take a look at a few places and see if they can find a "sweet" deal on a new home.

"Shall we take my car?" Polly asks.

"I don't know, might be a little tight," says Fred. "How about we take our gingerbread train instead?"

As the train takes them past fields of candy-sprinkled snow, Ginger begins to look worried. "We're getting pretty far away from the city, aren't we?"

"To find a house in your price range with the features you want, we'll have to look out in the suburbs," Polly explains. "Now, the first neighborhood I'm going to show you is a newer development called Gingerbread Acres. There are actually two houses for sale here, and I think you're going to like what you see."

"Well, here we are," Polly says. "Would you like to take a look inside?"

Fred points out the fallen gingerbread tree in the front yard of one of the homes. "These places don't look very well maintained to me."
Ginger nods. "There are cracks in the walls, too. It's like whoever iced this place together didn't bother to do it properly."

"These flat roofs are like a disaster waiting to happen," adds Fred. "One big frosting snowstorm, and your roof gumdrops are on the living room floor. It just seems like poor design to me."

"Thanks, Polly," says Fred. "But I think we'd like to see something else."

"Well, these places would definitely need a little TLC, but at this price either one would be a great value," Polly says. "But if you're wanting something a little more put together, I think you're going to love the next house."

"Now this one's a little farther away from the city, in Gingerbread Estates," Polly says when they are on the train again. "But it's nicely maintained, and it has the slanted roof you're looking for."

"Sounds great," says Fred.

"Here we are," Polly says. "What do you think?"

"Now this is more like it!" exclaims Fred.

Ginger's eyes light up. "I love the Peppermint motif in front! It's perfect!"

After touring the inside, they are convinced they've found their next home. "The bedrooms are a little small," says Ginger, "but I do like all the storage space."

"Plenty of room for all of our candy and extra frosting," agrees Fred.

"And peanut brittle counter tops," Ginger continues. "At this price, who can believe it!"

"And, oh, look honey--it even has a YARD!" Ginger exclaims.

"Yes, it's a lovely yard," Polly says. "Now, I should tell you, this house is a short sale."

Fred frowns. "What does that mean exactly?"

"Well..." Polly begins, but she is interrupted by Ginger's shriek.

"Hey guys!" she cries. "Look over there! In the yard! I think someone's hurt!"

"Oh, my!" says Polly. "Is it...could it be..."

"Gingerbread Santa Claus!"

"Oh my goodness!" Ginger says. "He must have slipped and fallen off the slanted roof!"

"Santa, are you okay?" Fred asks, leaning over to check for a pulse. "Can you hear me? Santa!"

"I'm calling 9-1-1!" says Polly, whipping out her cell phone.

"There's no time," Fred says. "We've got to get him to a hospital, NOW."

Together they load Santa onto the gingerbread train.

"Thank goodness we came when we did," Polly says, as the train begins chugging away.

Ginger nods. "Now, explain this short sale thing to me..."


Christina said...

That is so cute!

Anonymous said...

Happened on your site by accident, it was a joy to stay and read. At first glance I thought you had taken pictures of the gingerbread "creations" that adorn my table! :) THanks for the smile.

Nanny Goats In Panties said...

Well, I hope Gingerbread Santa is back on his feet again. Unless he was dead. Was he breathing? Generally if they aren't breathing, they're dead. I hope he was breathing.

p.s. this post was absolutely hysterical.

Rachel said...

Awesome for some holiday laughs!

But no re-hashing between commercials? Not quite House Hunters...;)

Junk Drawer Kathy said...

Nanny Goats sent me. This post is at once hilarious and devastating. Well done!

Babs-beetle said...

Hilarious! I bet you had a major clean up job afterward :)