Wednesday, August 26, 2009

'Cause I'm a Wooooman...

Growing up I was such a tomboy. I think at times I truly wished that I'd been born a boy. Maybe this was because I had two brothers and no one ever told them it was unladylike to slide across the hood of the car while wearing a dress. Anyway it seemed like boys got to do all the cool stuff, and most of the things I liked, such as sports and outdoor activities and not wearing dresses, were dominated by males.

I now realize that I was never, ever meant to be a guy. While it's true that I do not get excited about candles, chick flicks or "stamping," all other signs point to my low levels of testosterone.

Aside from the obvious physiological evidence, consider:

1. My life and happiness are not affected in any way, shape or form by the outcome of any professional, college or international sporting competition.

2. I do not like Quentin Tarantino movies. Hate them. Hate even thinking about them. Regret ever watching any of them. I don't know what it is but for some weird reason I just do not enjoy watching sociopaths torture people. Why does anybody like to watch these awful movies? Why does almost every guy I know like to watch them?

3. I don't remember every detail of every sporting event I ever participated in. Really I can only remember a few moments from my long and mediocre athletic career. Most of these memories have to do with personal interactions more so than the actual game. For instance, I don't remember any final scores.

4. I am happiest when my son's soccer game ends in a tie. Because that way neither team loses, see? I try to explain this to my husband. He just laughs at me.

1 comment:

lucythevaliant said...

Boo Quentin Tarantino movies! They are gross.